If rank-and-file nine to five jobs where you work for someone else make you SICK, read this.
If you KNOW you deserve only the best, or if you want to feel that way, read this.
I want to maintain the incredible feeling of being ALIVE and share that with as many people as I can. That's what this blog is about.
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THE DEFINITION OF SUCCESS
First, we have to define success and here is the best definition I’ve ever been able to find: “Success is the progressive realization of a worthy ideal.
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Hierarchy of Change
Today I want to write about different methods for making changes in the quality of our lives. This article is aimed at people who’ve already decided that they want to change. If that’s not you, that’s fantastic! Unfortunately though for most people there’s at least a few things in their lives they’d prefer were different - whether that means you want to work a more creative job, or you’re not happy with your physical appearance, or even if you feel your life would be more enriched by setting yourself a weekly schedule, there are many different ways that one might go about bringing this change into their world, and the different ways can be organised into a hierarchy that looks roughly like this:
Identity
Attitudes
Values
Beliefs/Decisions
Capabilities/Skills
Behaviours
Environment
Before I get into what these have to do with change, I’ll give a brief description of each level. Environment includes anything around a person, the external factors he or she can affect and the stimuli he or she receives in return. Behaviours are the physical actions of that person. Capabilities or skills are what that person is able to do, for example driving a car with a manual transmission requires a greater set of capabilities than driving with automatic transmission. Beliefs or decisions are convictions we have that things are true – and the reason I use belief and decision interchangeably is because we have the power to select our own beliefs. Values are what is really important to us and once we get to this point in the hierarchy we start to see the things that really define us as a person. You can meet someone from a completely different country with a different upbringing but if they have similar values and beliefs to you then you’re likely to be very similar people. A person’s attitudes, in terms of personal change, can be defined as their collections of values and beliefs centred around a certain topic, and identity – which is one of the strongest human psychological drivers – is how you define your sense of self.
When most people want to make a change, they do so on the level of environment or behaviour. That’s fine, it is possible to flow up-stream in this hierarchy. The problem is, it’s like swimming upstream. If you take someone who has a belief like “I’m not smart enough to do maths,” and put them in a room full of the best teachers in the world – sure they might learn more but they’re just as likely to shut down and hold onto that belief rather than open their mind. Alternatively, I’m sure you can imagine the empowering results the same person would get in a regular classroom if they only instilled in themself a belief like “Maths is a skill and I can learn it just as easily as anything else!”
One area where human beings seem to have gotten it right is smoking cessation. I read a while ago (please don’t ask me for a source!) that a significant portion of people who successfully quit smoking did so because they had a change on the level of identitiy – namely they used to identify themselves as “I am a smoker,” and post-quitting changed their identity to “I am a non-smoker.”
So, how does one make those higher level changes to make sure they stick? Well, my previous article has a few hints for making changes on the level of beliefs or decisions. I’m also a big believer in affirmations, especially when they’re said in a way that engages your physiology and carries emotional impact. For those that don’t know what an affirmation is, it’s simply something you tell yourself on a regular basis (at least once per day) to convince yourself of it. A good all purpose one is “I love my body.” To illustrate what I mean by saying this in a way that engages your physiology, try saying it while sitting slumped over with your shoulders caved in and your eyes on your feet. Now, say it again but this time stand up with a big smile on your face, head held high and move your body energetically as you say it. It feels different, doesn’t it? Your body is trained to move you towards things that feel good, so if you associate this new belief with a positive feeling in your body and as much positive emotional intensity as you can bring up then it’s going to be much easier for you to convince yourself on a subconscious level.
There are definitely other ways of making those high level changes but I’m running out of space here, so I’ll briefly mention that I’m a huge advocate of Neuro-linguistic Programming (NLP). NLP is a set of techniques that allow us to make rapid changes in the way our brains store and process information. I’m actually trained in NLP so if you’re interested in learning more or maybe in a free consultation session for some personal coaching drop me a line!
E: kieran@kaccoaching.com
Or
Ph: 0437 037 126
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Believing makes it real!
Achievement in any field requires commitment. There’s no easy route, there’s no shortcut to winning. To stand out in any field you have to put in a lot of work. That being said whatever your goal is, whatever your definition of “achievement” there’s plenty of ways to make the work you need to put in easier or more likely to bring that success.
Since this is my first article since my hiatus I’ve decided to talk about what I believe is the single most important factor in any sort of achievement.
Belief that something will happen aligns your subconscious with that outcome.
Now, that’s worded very deliberately because I didn’t want to give the impression that it’s only a positive thing. If you believe that there’s no way you can be financially successful or emotionally stable then it won’t happen. Your subconscious mind will sabotage you and seek out ways to bring about whatever you believe.
Despite the depressing way that last sentence sounds, if we’re aware of this it’s actually a good thing. We can direct our focus and commit ourselves both consciously and subconsciously towards whatever we hope to accomplish. To use an example – A few months ago I travelled to Adelaide to compete in a karate tournament. In this particular tournament the first and second place getters qualified to compete in a world title event in Japan in July, which was why I was there. I fought through each fighter to get into the final, but once there (and guaranteed first or second place – and therefore my place in Japan) I didn’t fight nearly as well as I had in the rounds. At the time I thought that my cardio fitness had simply run out. Looking back now, I can say yes, I would have fought much better if I’d been a bit fresher, but what made such a huge difference was my mindset. I’d already accomplished what I’d come for so my brain switched off.
Why did my brain switch off? Because all I’d believed I would do in Adelaide was to qualify for Japan, and once that was done my goal was accomplished. I didn’t have any strong beliefs about winning in Adelaide, so my mind wasn’t aligned with that goal.
So how can we convince ourselves to believe? There are a LOT of ways, so to keep this article succinct I’ll just give a few quick tips.
Make that little voice in your head work for you.
If you tell yourself “I will get a Distinction average at University this semester” but then have another voice that says “No you won’t, you’re stupid. You don’t work hard enough. Last semester you barely passed Spanish” then you don’t have internal alignment with your goals. The great thing is that you can train that voice to always be positive. Every time you have a negative thought like the ones mentioned above, just tell yourself “Not a useful thought” and think of two positive thoughts that contradict the negative one. Soon enough positive thoughts will be a habit for you.
Look for evidence
Our brains have a filter known as the Reticular Activating System that enables us to actually process the huge amount of information constantly streaming in. If we consciously decide to look for evidence to support a belief ( perhaps a belief like “I nourish my body with healthy food only”) then it doesn’t take long before our subconscious mind is looking for helpful evidence automatically.
Seek out positive influences
I could write several articles on this point, but for now I’ll restrict it to what’s related to believing in a goal. If there’s someone who is particularly negative about you accomplishing your goal – cut them out of it. If they’re not someone you can avoid, then just refuse to talk to them about anything even remotely to do with your goal. Conversely, actively seek out those people who are willing and able to encourage and support you in your goal. Hang out with the guys you met at the gym who can bench press a small car and want to help you do the same. Get lunch with the entrepreneur who’s got a successful small business in a similar field to the one you’re starting in. Put photos of the stage you want your band to play on up around your bedroom. Surrounding yourself with positive influences and messages will direct and propel you towards your target.
So give it a try! Set yourself a goal for the next month, convince yourself that it will absolutely occur- silence any little negative voices that say otherwise, look for evidence that you can do what you’ve set out to do and surround yourself with things that encourage and inspire you - and watch what happens.
Source: realsoundofprogress
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Every time you tell yourself something negative…
Say out loud to yourself “Change!” and then tell yourself the exact opposite of the negative thing you just said. You’ll be surprised how effective this is for changing the way you think in a powerful and positive way!
Starting Fresh!
I’ve very much neglected this blog for quite some time now - mainly due to having other commitments with my life. I’m happy to announce that I’ll be posting much more frequently and will hopefully be writing regular articles for Damned Mag (damnedmag.tumblr.com)
Check them out!
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